Why Do We Listen to Gossip? Because We Love Ourselves

 

Why Do We Listen to Gossip? Because We Love Ourselves

Key Scripture:

Proverbs 18:8 – "The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to the inmost parts."

James 1:26 – "If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless."

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Introduction: The Attraction of Gossip

Why do people listen to gossip? At its core, gossip is often fueled by self-interest. We may not realize it, but when we give our ears to gossip, it often reveals a love for ourselves more than a love for others. We enjoy gossip because:

1. It makes us feel important – Knowing something others don’t can give us a sense of power.
2. It makes us feel better about ourselves – Hearing about others’ failures can make us feel morally superior.
3. It satisfies curiosity – There’s a natural temptation to want to know what’s happening in other people’s lives.

But as believers, we must ask: Does gossip align with God’s will?

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1. Gossip Reveals Self-Love Over God’s Love

When we listen to or spread gossip, we often do so to elevate ourselves at the cost of someone else.

• Philippians 2:3 – "Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves."
• If we truly love others, we will protect their reputation rather than delight in their downfall.

Example:

Imagine a workplace where a co-worker’s mistake is shared in whispers. Instead of covering the person in grace, gossip exposes their weakness. Jesus, however, taught us to restore, not to ridicule.

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2. Gossip Separates, While Love Covers

• Proverbs 16:28 – "A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends."
• Love seeks to cover and restore, while gossip seeks to expose and divide.

Example:

Noah’s sons illustrate this principle in Genesis 9:20-23. When Noah became drunk and lay uncovered, Ham spread the news. But Shem and Japheth covered their father’s nakedness, showing honor and love instead of humiliation.

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3. Gossip Brings Judgment on Ourselves

Jesus warned that the way we judge others will come back to us.

• Matthew 7:2 – "For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."
• If we enjoy hearing others’ failures, we should be prepared for the same standard to be used against us.

Example:

The Pharisees brought a woman caught in adultery to Jesus, expecting Him to condemn her. Instead, Jesus turned their accusation back on them: “Let him who is without sin cast the first stone” (John 8:7). They had to leave one by one, realizing their own faults.

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How to Overcome the Temptation of Gossip

1. Guard Your Ears –

   • Proverbs 20:19 – "A gossip betrays confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much."
   • If someone constantly brings gossip, set boundaries or change the topic.

2. Speak Words That Build Up –

   • Ephesians 4:29 – "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up."
   • Instead of gossip, speak words of encouragement.

3. Love Others as Ourselves –

   • Matthew 22:39 – "Love your neighbor as yourself."
   • Would we want others to gossip about us? If not, we should avoid gossiping about others.

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Conclusion: Love Others More Than Yourself

The real reason we entertain gossip is often because we love ourselves more than we love others. But God calls us to love others more than ourselves (Philippians 2:3).

Final Challenge:

Before listening to gossip, ask:

• Does this honor God?
• Would I want someone to share this about me?
• Does this help restore or does it destroy?

Let’s reject gossip and choose love, grace, and unity instead. Amen!